List: Emergency Prep

This morning's post is brought to you courtesy of "what to do about the changing times?"  

My oldest Manling is fond of zombies and the apocalypse and took notes as he read the Left Behind books.  He jokingly refers to all things in a time frame that ends with 12/21/2012.  In an attempt to keep him under control (and also keep that little voice in the back of my OWN head quiet), I've made an effort to keep informed on items like this. 

Just a bit of a rant before I get to the list:  I can understand people scoffing and making fun of "random dates" and "conservative Christian mumbo jumbo".  As it says in the Bible, no one knows the date or time or even the hour.  Not even Jesus.  God will do His thing in His own good time...which I know from experience to be...well, whatever "His own good time" really is.  

I take in stride the people who ask me what I'm buying mass quantities of food for when there's plenty on the shelves.  (I DO have four growing Manlings, people.  See them rooting through the cart behind me???)  If I put some of that excess into jars or the freezer at home, well, call it "foresight".  It's not about the apocalypse or the possibility that our government could fall apart any day now.  It's a situation far scarier and more real.  We've Been. There.  

You know Where.  Where the bills run too high, and the money runs too short.  The only thing standing between you and a bunch of people calling, screaming to be paid is a prayer that God keep providing "just enough" every month.  (And He always has, I might add.)  If we hadn't had "extra" in the house, I'm not sure what would have happened.  I'm sure I don't want to find out.  

I should add that, when we were in the midst of this crisis situation, I had only STARTED looking into prepping.  Better late than never, right?  Yes, well.  Not again.  I swore I'd have a viable plan in progress within a year or two...just in case.  

You know the Just In Case too.  Just in case:  someone loses a job or gets "down-sized"; someone leaves or gets sick or dies...  Or there's even the Just In Case of when money just can't make ends meet for The Way We Used to Live.  There's a whole lot of that going around right now.  The people who had Lots of Everything have almost nothing of anything.  Granted, a lot of those people should have planned ahead, prepped, read, and realized that tomorrow is just as fluid as everything else.  But hindsight is always  20-20, as my momma used to say.  It is heartless and worthless to berate millions of people for their lack of planning.  I'd venture to say that sort of reasoning still applies to even some diehard preppers in one area or another of their lives.  

It should be no stretch then, to point to my life and say:  This?  Is where your goals ended up.  

It took another trip to the hospital for my husband for me to realize that I had not gotten as far as I had hoped.  But even if we're not There yet?  We're much closer to the goal than we were before.  I think most of the pieces are physically in the house...just not organized so well as I would have liked.  Cleaning The House will be Emergency Prep too--getting everything put in its place.

The Prep List then, for today:

1.  Get the Emergency Prep Plans printed off and ready to go.  (I've started using Food Storage Made Easy  You can sign up for a free emergency binder of ideas.  It gets emailed piece by piece every two weeks for a year.  I haven't had time to do much more than skim the lists and print them off for my Housecleaning Rampage next month, but I'm going to be ready when I get there!  I'm sure that MY list probably differs from theirs...and yours will differ from mine.  But this is a great jumping-off idea--they give you the basic framework; you fill in the holes.)

2.  Update my  "Alien Abduction Notebook".  I'm sure there's other names for it--but I love science fiction so the idea makes me giggle everytime I open the book.  And that's the point, right?  To OPEN the book...and work on it...and make sure The Family knows where it is.  This is what holds the Keys to Life As WE (The Family) know it.  Copies of birth certificates and SS cards and whatever else might need to run out the door in a hurry if we have a fire or a flood or a Zombie Apocalypse.  Stuff the Guys will need to know if something happens to...me. 

3.  Man-handle my actual Planners into submission.  This was my one Big Project for the month of December, and I'm getting close.  The Homeschool Planner actually went together far easier than I thought it would, most likely due to the fact that, even though it's my first Official Planner, I've been doing this gig for seven years.  I know what I need and what I don't...and that will change next year!  The Household Planner on the other hand...  *sigh*  It's not that I don't WANT to do it.  It's that every time I open it up, I see the last four years of not being organized; and it flattens me.  Once I'm in the full-on Rampage, I'm sure my planner will be very handy.  Right now it's giving me a Massive Inferiority Complex!  I also have my little Day Planner that I got down at "Ken's Educational Joys" in Ephrata a couple months ago.  I love writing things in it!  It's a whole new year!

I think that's enough for today.  Three items may not seem like much; but when you're dealing with a Full-on Household Cleaning Rampage, this is more than enough.  'Sides, I just need to be Ready by the end of the month, not Started.  That will come soon enough.

why am I always tired?

Some times I think the reason I drug my feet for so long to get out of my part time job was mainly to do my lack of energy on any given day.  I've wondered for a while now if there isn't something physically wrong with me--'cause it seems there should be no real reason for my regular fatigue.  But how will I function now that I have no "real" excuse to blame my inactivity and inability to DO something on?

I get plenty of sleep.

I don't always eat as well as I would like or exercise as regularly as I want to, but neither are completely lacking either.

I don't drink much or stay up till extra late hours.

But on a normal day I will have to DRAG myself out of bed around 7:00 in the morning (sometimes closer to 8:00).  I then spend at least half an hour (usually more) checking email or blogs or just doing everything I can to avoid being a Mom...or even a Human Being.

I  have long thought it was probably a combination of Stress, Anxiety, and hormones.  I know that in November/December when it starts to get dark and cold, I have some degree of seasonal affective disorder.  (All I need is one sunny warm day in the middle of all the gloom to prove that theory.)  But there are days in the middle of July that I have the exact same problem.  And then there are the random days when there's no real reason at all.   

It's rough.  And I don't know why it is.  

So now it's a goal--to either make the problem go away or at the very least make it easier to live. 

So the guys gave me the whole month to be a "bum" and settle into being home.  Which is nice.  It means I can get myself oriented and organized and ready to tackle the rest of life.  So I started in on getting my Planners together--Household and Homeschool and Emergency Prep.  I've made some pretty serious progress too, in between episodes of Atlantis and trying to beat Manling #1 at Castleville.  

I realized as I was going through my computer and flash drive that I've got SO much stuff I didn't even remember downloading.  But it's nice to know I don't have to reinvent the wheel to get myself together.

I've also started making Lists of things that need doing--by Day or by Activity, as it works out.  There's a lot of Paperwork, so I'll probably break some of that down into individual days or rotate weeks or something.  Likewise the Scout Lists.  

One item I can't wait to get back on my Lists is the Scrapbook Time for Mom.  I haven't even looked at my scrapbooking stuff since March.  That was in reference to the Eagle Scout book...and it didn't get finished.  It's all piled up on the ledge in the upstairs hallway--don't ask, I have no idea why!!  (Especially when you realize my scrapbooking table is in the basement.  *eyeroll*  Yeah....) 

I need to get through the school stuff for after the holidays too.  But since most of that is already in The Box, it shouldn't take more than an afternoon to finish up.  

Now...since I'm on Day 11 of my Bum Time...we interrupt this post to bring you another Episode of Stargate Atlantis...Season Four!  YAY.

Tonight was my second night of Not-Working.  

--When do you stop wondering what's going on there without you?

--How long does it take before the endless list of Things That You Aren't Doing At Work comes off repeat in your head?

--Who is sitting at my desk?  Doing my work?  Maybe doing it...better.

--What did my boss think when she realized I REALLY wasn't coming back? 

--Why does it matter if I'm happy being home?

These are the things I can't post on my Facebook Wall.  Two of the girls from work read that...and I can't bring myself to try to explain to them why I left earlier than I had planned.  I'm not even sure I totally understand myself.

I can't discuss these questions with the Manlings or the Hubby.  Why?  Because they don't quite understand when I say things like, "I loved my job" or "my boss is going to hate me"--they wonder why it matters.  I have them to take care of and love and homeschool and spend the rest of my life with.  It was just a job.  Right?

Sure.  It WAS just a job.  But it was a job I was good at.  It was a job I had for nine and a half years...and I turned my back on a good paycheck and great hours and work I was excellent at...to be with them. 

Only here, in my blog, can I try to work through the morass of feelings and mixed emotions that I have about being a SAHM as opposed to a working medical secretary.  Try to somehow find some middle ground in my head about Who I am now and Where I am not anymore.  Maybe make some sense out of the jumbled craziness that has been these last three months.

Why did I leave Now...rather than in two weeks as was the Original Plan? 

I told myself it was because I was just fed up with the idiocy of the Docs trying to find competent help.  But if I'm being honest (and I need to be, brutally, messily, completely transparently Honest), then the real reason I left Now rather than Then, is because I just couldn't train someone to replace me.  

Whatever my boss thinks of me now, the brutal truth is that deep down, this was not a decision I made lightly.  I didn't wake up one morning and decide that I hated my job and didn't want to be there anymore.  It took nearly six months of back-and-forth with the Hubby before we finally decided together that it really was time for me to stay home.  It took another four weeks before I mustered up the courage to actually tell my boss I was quitting.  I gave her six weeks' notice...and then volunteered to stay on another three months when another Front Desk girl quit that same week.  Dragging my feet to leave??  I'd say just a bit.  

Then they actually hired someone to do my myriad assortment of jobs...and I suddenly had to face the realization that The End was finally in sight.  

Part of me was ecstatic!!  I was looking at the end of not being home with my boys, and my house would finally get the attention it needed so desperately.  What I posted this morning about an Adrenaline Surge for Housekeeping was an understatement.  I was PSYCHED!!  The house would be clean and tidy; the floors would be swept; the meals would be planned and made; the budget would be controlled....

....and someone else would sit in My Office...at My Desk...using My Computer...doing My Work.

Change is hard.  Even when it's welcome and long overdue.  

I just walked away from a job I had been in for almost a decade...a job I loved....to stay home with the ones I love....and I can't tell you if the tears are of loss...or happiness.  I made the right choice.

But it wasn't easy.

I have decided.  

*pause*

I have decided (which is more than half the battle, y'know?)...AHEM.

I have decided:

a)  I will make the Lord my focus each day, and I will walk in the path He's set before my feet.  I will do this INTENTIONALLY.

b)  I will be the mother and wife I want to be.  If not now, then when?  Better to do it now.

c)   I will be more organized in 2012.

d)  I will post each night before bed as recap.

e)  I will get my Lists in order and keep them.

f)  I will start to catch up all of the projects I have started and not finished.

g)  I will clean the house from top to bottom, and I will be the Keeper of THIS House.

h)  I will get our Emergency Prep Plans back under control, and then I will implement them.  No more putting things off....not in these times.  

To further all these aims, I am using the rest of December as "Prep Month".  I need to get my planners updated and organized.  I've been woefully under-organized the last four years.  That must stop.  

Funny how once you make the Plan to Start, the adrenaline starts to flow.  One wouldn't equate the start of a race for instance with a (re)start of Homemaking.  But I suppose it's all the same to your brain chemistry.  It's an eagerly anticipated event, something to be sought after and waited for (however impatiently).  

And I've waited a LONG TIME to reach this point.  

I am home.  Thank God.

I. Am. FREEE!!!!

I will officially be a stay-at-home/homeschooling Mom as of 2:00 EST on Wednesday afternoon.  YAY!!  It's taken a long time...but the wait was worth it.  I'm just glad to be on the downhill stretch.

The Weekly Canning

Today's canning list is brought to you courtesy of the vegetables: celery, onions, carrots, and rooted parsley....all of which were excised from the rich black composted earth in my garden boxes to take up new residence in my fridge, freezer, and almost two dozen canning jars on the shelves. 

I found a wonderful recipe last year in Mother Earth News for "Roasted Root Vegetables" which is pretty much nothing but chop 'em, toss 'em in olive oil, and roast 'em in the oven till they taste fantastic.  This cannot, of course, be canned; but it freezes very well for later.  I've done various combinations of all the above mentioned veggies, along with potatoes, parsnips, and turnips.  (The turnips I accidentally baked almost crunchy....and they were the best batch so far!  But I'm one of those weirdos who likes black hot dogs too, so...)  Since my children are impervious to the deliciousness of this mess, I have done single servings for me to eat at work. 

All of the carrot tops, parsley greens, and some of the onions, along with the celery "fringe" went into my biggest stock pots to be boiled down into the most beautifully green organic veggie stock imaginable.  I had gotten the celery on special buy at the local farmer's market (49 cents a head), so I chopped up most of it, dug out one of the onion beds, and heated up a dozen pint jars of veggies--which were then canned in my wonderful stock.  I then filled my "little" canner with 7 quart jars of stock...and this post is brought to you courtesy of a gorgeous summer sunset on my back deck as my two canners "gurgle" away on the outside stove. 

This would not have been possible without the combined effort of all the Men in the House--since our deck roof was just finished over Memorial Day Weekend, and it would simply have been too stinking hot in the sun to can without it.  I love my Manlings!  (And their father too...)  LOL

Next up...green beans...and yellow beans...and scarlet runner beans...oh my...

We're NOT Unschoolers! *SOB*

...er...

Okay, according to the "original" definition of "unschooling" at the Yahoo Board I used as My Homeschooling Bible/Resource when we started out on this journey 7 years (almost to the day!) ago, we're still (to my way of thinking) "unschoolers".  At that time, unschooling on the Board was defined as "child led learning".  Within certain parameters (mainly my OCD and my DH's insistence on Math, English, and Science as "regular" classes) most of what we do on a yearly basis is chosen by the Manlings.  Even books and other miscellany for The Core Three were approved and subjected to the test of the Manlings' time and tolerance.  In other words, I know my guys.  I know what makes them miserable, and I know when they are just giving me a line about how "boring" something is.  (Boring here being a subjective term referencing just how much they would rather be playing with their iPods and laptops and other paraphernalia.)  

My youngest two like to work together.  Manling #3 is content to work below his "grade level" if it means he doesn't have to work through his English by himself.  Manling #4 has benefited from this is a number of ways--he's far and away the best speller in the house, knows a good bit of grammar for a boy his age, and realized that all those letters in books spell out wonderful stories and vast amounts of knowledge that he is now able to mine for himself.  I won't even comment on the happiness in my heart at the way the two of them work together.  On a Perfect Day, the heavens open and angels sing over our dining room table!  *cheesygrin*  All the other days, we lock the doors and pretend we don't live here!

Manling #2 likes to do his own thing...which generally means trying to buck The Core Three and spend as much time as he can either outside on his rollerblades/bike or up in his room with his head buried in a book that (while educational) isn't going to help his plan to graduate from "high school" before he's 30.  He's beginning to realize now that goals are not there to limit him but rather to challenge and prod him on to the next step on his path.  He does have a pretty concrete plan of "where he wants to be".  We just have to help him get there.  

Manling #1...has discovered that when "classes" have a purpose, he's much better pleased to try to comply with a teacher's request.  He started VoTech last year and is maintaining a high A average, despite his apparent lack of interest in everything else.  My biggest problem at the moment has been his discovery of a social life and the amount of time it seems to be eating up in his schedule.  We are going to have another go-round about it post-camp again, I know it.  

In the midst of all this homeschooling bliss, something happened.  

The definition of  'unschooling' changed at The Board, and suddenly I am confronted with the proposition that our years ought to be "endless summer vacation with learning happening as you bump into it."  Or something to that effect.  

Taken back just a bit by this shift in the universe, I asked Manling #3 if he thought "endless summer vacation" would be beneficial.  He (being of the honest and no nonsense persuasion) blithely informed me that he'd prefer to just go back to public school then.  Seems endless summer vacation sounds about as boring as it is trite.  

Thing is, the Manlings have definite goals.  And while letting learning opportunities happen "organically" SOUNDS wonderful?  Sometimes when you know what you want, you need to chase after it....not just pray it turns in your direction.  In that sense, we still follow the original definition of "unschooling"...child led learning.  They are leading me in the direction they need to go to attain their goals.  

And honestly?  It's okay if we don't get the "endless summer vacation".  We prefer "autumn walks in the woods at twilight" anyway. 

Coffee

Ask anyone.  I have a Coffee Problem. 
It's tragic really.  I used to be a fairly normal girl.  I drank iced tea, water, occasionally the glass of apple juice.  Sometimes I'd have a beer if it was a social occasion. 

Now I live from cup of coffee to cup of coffee.  I tried to give it up for Lent this year.  That lasted all of a week...till the basement flooded and my Manlings very wisely handed me the largest hottest cup of coffee they could lay hands on before leading me down the steps to see The Flood.

I tell myself that if I really want to get serious about the weight loss thing, I should lay off the Java and start hitting the water.  But where's the fun in that???  I even switched to Almond Milk rather than regular milk in an attempt to convince myself that it's "not so bad" to have six cups before noon.

*sigh*  Not working.
So what coffee can't I live without if it's become the central part of my operating system? 

1.  New England Coffee's Blueberry Cobbler.  I'm sure for some of you coffee purists that sounds just awful, but my boss got me hooked at work in a rather underhanded fashion (she refused to make anything else for two weeks).  Now she and I are both devotees.
2.  Dunkin Donuts French Vanilla--I have to confess I only drink this if I go to the store to get it.  I love it fresh made (and not by me).  LOL
3.  Sheetz Vanilla Nut--Discovered on a roadtrip with a friend of mine (Rachel!) to see another friend (Meg!).  Have been unable to function properly without at least a cup or two a week since.  It's good stuff, guys.  If you need a quick fix?  This is the way to go.
4.  For plain ole coffee, I have to admit that I'm a Folgers girl.  There's not much to tell when it comes down to the bare nuts and bolts of my coffee problem.  I'm a redneck/cowgirl at heart, and if I've got no fancy fixins' I'm just fine with it hot and black. 

Just make sure you keep it comin'!

The Weekly Canning

This week's canning will be relatively simple (I hope).  After spending the weekend putting the roof on the deck, I'm pooped.

Things to can this week:
1.  Strawberry jam--that's right, I managed to save a nice chunk of our strawberry crop from the robins.  So I will be canning jam this week!  YUM.  Am going to try the Pomona Pectin that one of the girls on the Home Canning Board recommended.  Cuts out the sugar and supposed to be dummyproof.
**Canned 7 jars of jam--kept one in the fridge "chus fer so".  YUM.  And the Pectin worked like a dream!  And fast.  
2.  Vegetable Broth--if I have time.  We're starting to run short so it's gotta be done sometime.
3.  Beans--only if I have fifteen spare minutes and have nothing better to do.  Don't see that happening.

**highlighted in red means Not Done. Crossed out means Done.

The List of Lists (Part I)

LISTS!
For those of you who don't know me well, I LOVE lists.  There's just something about the orderliness of a well-made and checked off list that makes the OCD in my heart and soul sing with delight.

So, in order to take full advantage of this, I'm going to make my blog a series of lists.  Daily lists, project lists, general to-do lists, canning lists, storage lists.  You name it, I'm gonna make a list of it (if possible).  YAY!  I luff it!

What lists will I do this week?  Hmmm...let's see...
I should have some weekly lists:


1.  The Weekly Canning
2.  Cleaning This Week
3.  Counting My Blessings
4.  Tales from the Zoo
5.  Household Projects
6.  Steal a Moment for Myself (Books)
7.  A Look Back (and Ahead)

Mmmm...yes, I like this.  If all else fails, I can cut and paste while in the midst of five other things, right?  LOL

Some miscellaneous posts for this week:
1.  Reasons Why I Hate PA
2.  Coffee
3.  Tales of Parsley

Yes, I think I can manage this.  It will also be something fun for me to help keep track of stuff too.  ("Tales of Parsley" will be about the care, cultivation, and drying/freezing of parsley.  Something I need to remember anyway.)

Alright, that said, I'm going to go get some chores done and get back to this later.

Things I'd LIKE to do with this Blog

When I started this blog, it was supposed to be my "adult blog".  The blog where I kept all the notes about homeschooling and homesteading and just being me.

*sigh*

I have not been as proactive in that move as I would have hoped I could be.  In all fairness, it's been a rough year so far.  We've been up to our ears in Life--Eagle Scout and Webelos Crossover ceremonies, homeschooling, basement tide pools, and trying to figure out why this whole mess isn't working anymore.

While I can't stop Life from happening, I do know partially why it's not working so well now:  a mother was meant to be home with her kids and her husband, taking care of her home and making four bare walls into a place of comfort and shelter.  I'm so tired of being a "working mom."  

After a long long overdue chat with my husband, I have managed to make him see that all of the things he's constantly complaining about at home are things that I SHOULD be taking care of in that time between finishing up school with the boys in the afternoon and when he gets up in the evening.  Housework and meal planning and school prep for the next day.  Hours and hours of things that don't get done because I'm Not Here.  

I've also finally convinced him that we are never going to "keep up with the Joneses" and thankgod for that!  I don't WANT to feel like I need to have everything that everyone else has.  I want to just have what we have and work with that.  I don't need to have all the new fancy gadgets or expensive clothes and stuff that the rest of America flaunts (like we are entitled to it).  I'm tired of trying to keep track of the stuff that clutters our house as it is.  I've been slowly trying to weed through everything and regain some control over what we do have and need.

So from here on out, I'm going to try and use my Blog to that advantage:  to chronicle my quest to find my quiet center at Home...and my transition out of The Job. 

*sigh*

Did you hear that scream?  My boss.   She's not going to like this....